The Impact of Machismo and Matriarchy on a Relationship
About the author: Alison Griffin is a bachelor in English philology and literature at Oregon University. She is currently working as one of the best writers at the analytical paper example She also studies feminine psychology
Results of development cannot be maximized and verified without paying proper attention to the needs and interests of women and men. The word gender describes the biological sex of a person and so-called social sex. The gender is a set of stereotypes that lead to the formation of a typically male or female behaviour. Gender equality means equal status for men and women. In order to realize human rights men and women should have equal conditions.
Since the Stone Age, woman has been marrying with the onset of menses in order to give a birth to children. With the development of civilization, women received new chances of self-realization. However, over the centuries, women are considered being homemaker firstly, and then a full member of society. Probably, it is needed more than a decade to rebuild the traditional understanding of the role of men and women in society and family.
Morphologically the development of a man is more emphasized than that of a woman. Anthropologists regard a woman as intermediate in development between a child and a man. A woman has the soul of a little girl in spite of the fact that she is a mother, a grandmother, and a wife. She needs protection and love as a child. At the same time, sometimes women perform male’s work. Therefore, these two origins can exist in a woman’s soul.
The view that everyone is oppressed by sexism demonstrates the concept of oppression of its political meaning. It obscures social relations of domination and subordination.
Throughout history, one has seen repeatedly changing social structures. Patriarchy had been changed by matriarchy. But quite often one can find mention of the phenomenon that was peculiar to any society – oppression and discrimination of women. The girl is prepared to the social role of wife and mother from a young age, and boy is prepared to the role of protector, breadwinner, and a head of household. Especially it is prevalent in the East where the woman does not have equal rights with man.
In the early twentieth century, there was a start of a revolution for equality. Women won the right for education and career. But some representatives of the male sex still have primary instincts of possessiveness for the woman. Machismo may be considered to be a widespread phenomenon among Mexican-American males. However, it is too simplistic to be useful and in reality far from being accurate.
A man is a husband and father. He has a special place in family and community and performs an indispensable role in the physical, social and spiritual life. The problem is that in today's world, there are a lot of different ideas about what should be a male, and what he should do. The concept of machismo came after the spread of feminism and empowerment of women by certain rights. There could not be any chauvinism in an era of virulent patriarchy such as a woman from birth was the property of men, dissidents were betrayed to the sacred fire.
In those days, the idea of inferiority of women was common. Almost all men were sexist. There were scholars, poets, philosophers among them. Modern men like to refer to this circumstance in an attempt to justify their rights. They completely ignore the fact that ancestors lived in a certain socio-cultural environment that has little common with current realities.
Human history has faced periods when slavery and torture considered to be absolutely natural (the ancient world), burning people at the stake because of redheads and strabismus were normal (Middle Ages), attracting 7-year-olds to work in factories and mines for 16 hours a day were popular (XIX century), the execution without trial existed (XX century), etc. Sexists are willing to accept all of the above mentioned phenomena as delusions, but the issue of women remains for them a sacred. In the era of the formation of mankind, the beauty of women was praised for in almost all civilizations. However, it was forbidden to speak about the presence of the woman’s brain. Agnonika from Athens was stoned after the exposure of her secret doctor.
Machismo is based on social inequality between men and women. Machismo is a cultural phenomenon. Negative form of machismo includes violence towards women, alcoholism and having other sexual partners besides wife. The negative sides of machismo could be heavy drinking and the passion to some high-risk activities, which leads to domestic violence or HIV/AIDS.
Machismo is based on the following postulates a man is always right; furthermore, males are more important, more necessary, and more intelligent than women. The explanation is that male logic is based on reasons rather than feelings; what is belonging to a man, is forbidden for a woman; moreover, man’s word is the law for a woman.
Typically, machismo as an ideology arises on the basis of education. In many families, children are raised in strict accordance with such facts that a woman should be a mother, able to cook, clean, etc., and the man should be the protector, the head, and the breadwinner. The position of women in sports and her mental skills are questioned too.
The origins of this phenomenon can be seen in religion. The Bible saved the legend of creation, God created Adam first, and then from his rib, God created Eve. She was born to comfort and entertain men. And the original sin was committed, not by Adam, but by Eve, who disrupted the apple from the tree of knowledge.
In such way, at all desire, many women cannot take a position in a career. And it is easier for men to take a higher position in politics, literature, art, science, and even in the church men achieve much greater.
However, some people state that machismo has advantages. Machismo can be positive in the form of taking care of the family, showing valor amongst peers, working hard for money to support the family, and taking pride in the raising of children.
The fact is that machismo has a negative influence on relationships. The permanent emphasis on masculine authority and power had done great evil to the world and the mind.
Men do an attempt to put a woman in a comfortable for him conditions. Every man has own idea of how ideal woman should look like.
Employment of men in the household is becoming widespread in many countries. Such decision is taken often together by wife and husband because of the simple economic calculation. After the birth of the child, couple has a choice who will take over the care for baby and doing household chores. If the wife’s income is higher than husband’s, ideal decision will become the fact of husband’s sitting at home. To learn wisdom of house’s support is realistic. Men who are not burdened by complexes and stereotypes are the most prepared for such a mission. Such man can feed family, tidy clothes, and take care of children without problems.
The idea of matriarchy is no less dangerous for the relationships. It means that the leading role is played by a woman. Usually, the matriarchal family is built on the principle of domineering of self-confident woman under calm and quiet man who recognizes the leadership of his wife. The head of the family is the wife-mother who maintains not only her children, but also her husband. The history of matriarchy began with the time when person has stood out from the animal world, the herd was replaced by the tribe and consciousness and self-awareness appeared. At this moment, the woman took a central position in the original society.
It can be seen from the historical references that the mother-women take power into their own hands when the existence of the family was providing by them when the male gender was not wealthy. By nature, women are more responsible creation, but also more flexible. Under favorable conditions, if the man takes responsibility for family, woman will always give way for him.
In ancient times in Greece, the issue of fatherhood was unknown. The first Athenian king Tsekrops has created a system of individual marriage. Greek customs allow a man to marry his half-sister, but in any case the sister of the mother. The concept of relationship existed only for women.
Matriarchal heritage can be traced among the Celts, princesses choose their husbands. In ancient Egypt, the ancestors were determined through the female line, and family tree was always created by the mother of the family. The spouse has been assigned only one function. She was a true lady of the house. Matriarchy left traces in Spain, the ancient custom according to which the heir is not the son, but the son in law, considered as a kind of servant at his wife's parents, retained in the south-east of France. The same custom was once common in India. There was a special kind of marriage, called service. Another relic of a matriarchy was tradition, according to which a woman was living with her mother, and her husband was coming to visit her.
A situation, where are a wife in the family and a few men, has long existed in some Himalayan villages in northern India, Nepal, Bhutan and China. However, modern civilization in which male dominates, gradually gets into these god-forsaken places. Families with male harems are disappearing.
In such type of marriage, woman has no time for procreation. Traditionally children follow the example of their parents in a family. The boy will grow meek, and the girl will be a copy of her mother.
Therefore, the family with the strong power of mother contributes wrong education outlook in children. In the future, these children will not be able to build healthy personal and family relationships. A little girl hears unflattering remarks about father. She thinks that her father is a creature that does not understand elementary because of his gender. Girl, who is infected with such a behavior, grow ardent careerist. Such iron lady cannot be happy in personal life. Situation should be corrected. In the opposite case, it threatens not only the fact that the child will get a distorted picture of the world, but also can cause a variety of psycho-sexual violations in the future. Some people with different sexual orientation were brought up by quite normal parents. The children were just inspiring a sense of all-round superiority over the opposite sex, what could go into a complete rejection and exclusion.
Mutual respect for the spouses is always seen by children. Their pattern of behavior becomes the base for the baby, as the ultimate truth. Therefore, even if the husband and wife disagree, they need to solve problems without young witnesses. Undermining the authority of the mother in the eyes of the son is very dangerous. In the future, he will behave in relation to her mother incorrectly, and it will be the result of your family quarrels when in a fit of temper father blames the mother of stupidity, adding that it is not worth to wait intelligent judgments or actions from the woman.
The same problem exists from generation to generation. Women abuse men with admirable persistence and with the constant negative result. If all of these forces are directing in peaceful aims, there would be happiness in all families. As the result of matriarchy, modern men have a negative attitude for marriage. Many of them call family slavery, and believe that it is on the side of women, completely ignoring the rights of man.
In fact, the advantages of matriarchy are negligible since the wife only makes sure her talent to lead, and the husband is happy that someone has commanded him. A mother’s love to the children is in the centre of matriarchy. It is common to all animals, not just human. There is nothing heroic in the self-sacrificing love to the children. Such love is programmed at the genetic level. The love to descendants is one of mechanisms of evolutionary survival of all humanity.
Equilibrium is achieved by the fact that each party maintains its purview and domination. And both sides are fully satisfied with the relationship. The woman dominates at home, in the providing of comfort for family. The man is dominant in the field of protection of the family from the external environment, and providing family with necessary resources.
Some people forgot, others do not know, but the majority does not even think about the goal, purpose, and meaning of life. Contemporary society entangled in relationships. Neglecting the spiritual and moral laws of the family, the people cause pain and destruction themselves. After all, family life can bring happiness, joy and a blessing, but also a marriage built on a wrong basis can lead to a great sorrow.
The most active participants of clarifying gender relations are men and women who have never been married, and do not plan to create a family and have children, or those who are on that front just out of luck. And it does not mean they are bad. It is their fate, or it is dictated by their inner conviction.
People who have great relationships in the family, children, a normal job, and satisfied life, just do not need, and never engage in such dismantling. They already have enough troubles. Such families are successful because instead of finding the culprit they just live, love, work, trying to keep and preserve not fashionable ideals and values of family. A matriarchy and patriarchy in these couples get along well with each other.
However, harmony in relationships and cohabitation can be achieved only if the spouse is not assumed by all responsibilities. They should be divided between all members of the family. If a wife has to work hard because of laziness of her husband, family could not be called happy. The woman will be constantly irritated. One can say the same about the role of man. If he is forced to sit at home while he dreams of professional development and career, there will be no peace in such a family. Dissatisfied couple will quarrel, and that can affect the health of their children. Children need a mother with her natural tenderness and affection.
The main breadwinner must always be a man. When husband or wife really love and respect each other, they will not replace or command, but make every effort to ensure that a spouse is happy.
People need to find common language, to understand and accept each other without comparing or contrasting. It is the key to true love and a sign of a high individual and society. One can say that any format of family life may be ideal for a family. Two loving and understanding people choose their own way and quality of living together. It is more important that this model of relations suits both of them.
Every person should not be dominant, aggressive, and emotionally unavailable. People do not have to exhibit a lack of emotions. Together couple can deny the paradigm of machismo or patriarchy. It can be started inside human’s heart and mind.